Friday, October 22, 2010

Despair

I have a lot to update about but I can't even wrap my brains around any sort of normalicy right now. My dear sweet aunt who is only 5 years older than me is losing her baby boy right now. Samson was born with Ds and a holey heart, and had surgery on Sept 7th to repair his heart. He's never recovered and is now trending downward... The doctors have told her there's nothing more they can do for him.


She's taking it all with grace and such resolve. I cannot even fathom the depths of dispair she must be feeling, because I know how I am feeling.

I've never met him. I live too far away. And now, if he does die, how on earth can I NOT go out to be with my family who lives 1100 miles away? You're supposed to vacation for fun reasons not tragic ones.

My heart hurts.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Nine? Or Ten?

Carsten said a funny thing to me tonight:


"Momma, the story said I have ten fingers and ten toes. That's not right! I counted and I only have nine!" Okay, then.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Dear Carsten

Carsten turned 4 yesterday!

Here is his birthday letter:

October 8th, 2010

Dear Carsten,

So today, you turn four. It’s amazing to me to think that you are the age now that Tyrus was when you were born. I am continually flabbergasted by how quickly time goes by, and the fact that you are now four years old just confirms that to me all the more.

This has been a big year for you! Last year, on your third birthday, you were still wearing diapers and had absolutely no interest in learning to use the big boy potty. But, I am happy to report that now, as a four year old, you are potty trained! Yay! We are still working to stay dry over night, and I am confident that will come soon, but in the mean time, you are doing a great job during the day! I am so proud of you!!! Yippee!

You are learning your ABCs and can count up really, really high! I don’t even know how high, but it seems higher than it should be for your age! You love to color and play with play-doh. Curious George, The Cat In The Hat and Tom & Jerry are still high on your list of loves, too. Reading stories is always a good thing and anything to do with Turtle Ninjas is great too. Recently, you’ve camped out in your big brother’s room a few times and you thought that was so cool! Aunt Stephanie got you a Turtle Pillow Pet for your birthday and you are hooked! Every night, you lay down and listen to a tape of stories – usually ones read by your Grandma Karen.

I do have to say that you are a feisty kid! You want things the way you want them, and you don’t like it when I tell you “no!” You say, “but momma, hear the whole thing!” when you are trying to convince me of something. You are still very picky with food, but I am excited to note that you tried pineapple the other day and, in your words, you “chewed up two pieces!” Yay! Peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, bananas, peas, chicken nuggets, milk and yogurt are some favorites. Most things meaty you turn your nose up to, with the exception of ground meat. I’m not sure if you’re turning into a vegetarian on us or what?!

You also learned how to go into the pool with just your swimmies on your arms this summer! That was so cool when you realized you were tall enough to touch the bottom with your feet and stand up! You are getting so big!

I love you so much, Carsten. You bring light and life to our household. I cannot imagine what our life would have been like without you and I feel so very blessed and fortunate that God decided to have you come and be part of us. Your daddy and I love you so much.

Happy birthday, bud!

Love, Momma